Let’s face it, waking up to crying babies, stumbling over clothes that get folded but piled up and not put up, staying in a hurry to stay ahead of the next tantrum (and I’m mostly talking mine – not our toddler’s) can make that spark of romance we once ignited… well, fizzle away. I look at him, my have and to hold, through smudged eyeglass frames and he back at me, as I pick up my stray hairs that started to fall out and fly away months ago. A postpartum perk.
He is handsome. He looks at me behind water colored eyes, and I know I am loved. It is a covenant love, and we hold hands to pray over oatmeal and fruit smoothies.
He listens. He suggests we start a new Bible study together. Swept off my feet. Sometimes, it is a phrase just like that one that melts the grit away, and I feel polished and pretty and prized.
Yes, yes, let’s do it!!
After our second son arrived in February, we have been even more aware of the speed at which time passes. We start out the day in the bed, hearing an alarm chirp, and return at night much too quick. We realize if we do not keep our focus on God, then each other, then our boys… work, extended family/church/friends, and so on, we will all be left behind.
A dear friend loaned me a copy of Gary Thomas’ book “Sacred Marriage,” and it’s been on the nightstand for almost a year. I had read parts and prayed, but it is time to dive in, take it in, together.
So last night, as we listened to our youngest suck his little hand, asleep in his crib next to us, we climbed into our bed and opened the book. We took turns reading aloud, we held hands, we read scripture, we prayed.
The author reminded us that we aren’t fashioned together in marriage to necessarily live a happily ever after but (my paraphrase) live a holy ever after. By learning the faith, obedience, grace, sacrifice we can encounter (if we fully try) in marriage, we can truly realize the commitment and love we owe our Heavenly Father and that He lavishes on us. There is no greater love.
I think about what marriage means, about the generations to come. My prayers for our boys have already included their future families; yes, long before each son was in my arms. I pray for Godly spouses who love and support them with hearts surrendered to Him, but I also pray that their wives will each feel captivated by their love. I desire for their families together to enjoy a holy ever after, for babies of their own to lead and raise up as warriors for His Kingdom, as I pray our sons will be. My prayer each day is to make them a little less dependent on me and a little more dependent on Him, our King, the lover of our souls.
Sacred. Polished. Prized.
I give thanks for my partner in this journey. A divine romance indeed.
“As a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you.” Isaiah 62:5
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