I took Benadryl to try and stop these sniffles. It’s cold season, and I’ve got the kind that require me to unroll half the roll of toilet paper from our bathroom and put it on my nightstand, aka the little blue table that’s now too lightweight to keep upstairs in our son’s nursery but big enough to hold all the random toys, hair ties and books I never read before bed.
I’m holding my phone to type and my almost nine month old, who I’ve tried to lay down to sleep in his bed twice already.
He awoke with tears, so now he sleeps in my bed, with arms stretched wide around my belly. I watch his perfect, litte face lit up, so pure. A touch of His holiness and creativity and power, zipped up in airplane pajamas.
And so why am I writing a post at midnight when all i really need is sleep, and I have the most precious view I could dream of at the moment?
Because I am reminded of something too special not to share.
My son loves. He feels safe and peaceful and happy in my arms. He sees no ugly, no dirty, no scars; he only sees me. The good part of me; the best part.
It heals like medicine.
He only sees me. Now. Who I am at this moment, glowing in the cell phone light.
“For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves.” Colossians 1:13
In my Bible study group tonight, I heard testimony after testimony of the redeemed; how God overcame and won.
There are struggles we face beyond our control, and yet others that we have such difficulty letting go of. Mistakes, regrets, bitterness, hurt.
“No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Romans 8:37-39
Victory is in Jesus. Love is.
And so as tonight turns into tomorrow, I watch innocence asleep on my lap, and I am in awe. I am in love.
I am in love with a God who turns my bruises into beauty, who can give me such peace and rest if I let Him.
I will let him.
“Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.”
Ephesians 3:20-21
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